


i chose you

by rockybluewigs (lesbianbey)



Category: Kickin' It
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bisexual Male Character, Gay Male Character, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Past Relationship(s), idk how else to tag this tbfh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-01
Updated: 2016-07-01
Packaged: 2018-07-19 10:57:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7358473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesbianbey/pseuds/rockybluewigs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You're right. There's a plethora of people I can choose from, girl or boy. But, I choose you. I choose you because I love you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i chose you

**Author's Note:**

> imported from ffnet  
> rockybluewigs (ffnet) bisexual-leo-dooley (tumblr)

Fucking fuck. I should have known. The only reason Jack was ever interested in me, was to get to her. I should've seen it sooner. That stupid, blond bitch was begging, lusting, thirsty for his attention, and she finally got it. She finally has him, under her clutches, and now I can care less. I hate Jack. I fucking hate Jack. But I don't either - he's my everything, ever since we finally took that step in our relationship. I gave up everything for him - the little bit of love of my parents, my last bit of innocence, my first real kiss, my keyboard I used to win the competition.

My lucky shirt.

Everything.

It's destroyed, now.

_"You know, if you keep admiring Jack from afar, you'll never get the boy," Julie advises, with a Cheshire grin on her face. She knows how much he means to me. She knows everything about me that I can't dearly tell my friends. She's been a great friend. "God damn it, Milton, just go over there and ask him out. I'm pretty sure he's wondering the same thing."_

_"We're best friends." It's true; ever since Jack's first day at school, we've bonded even closer than friends normally do. However, I always thought he saw me as a pasty nerd with virtually no friends, even with a badass delinquent and a virtuosic kid who wanted to take karate to avoid dancing. I never cared about the group of people I hang out with - I feel cool with a plethora of nerds by my side, with plenty of diversity._

_But when Kim bumped into the guy of my dreams for the next three years, I know it's over. They bonded over new kid smells and apples, and I watched her act coy. From that moment, I know I will lose my chance._

_"So what? Relationships start with a good friendship. You know that." Julie has a point. That's how we kind of started our pseudo-relationship, before she found out that I was gay, and I only wanted her to make someone else jealous. Julie wasn't mad, because she knew from the start. "I want you to go over there, and ask him out to that new movie coming out next week. I think it's the Hunger Games movie or something. Don't really know, don't really care."_

_"You think so?"_

_With that, she cups her hands over her mouth. "Oh Jack—" I cover her mouth completely, and glare at her. It doesn't matter, he's looking, and he's coming this way._

_Fuck._

_"I hope you burn in the fiery pits of hell," I whisper over to Julie, who smirks against my hand._

_She swats my hand away from her mouth. "Here comes your chance!" She slaps my back rather harshly, and winks at me. "Go get 'em, ginger tiger." She gets up, and leaves the table, leaving me alone until Jack comes over. I stare at his fourteen year old glory - his developing muscles barely hidden against the shirt he's wearing; the medium length, girlish hair that's never unkempt; the slightly relaxed jeans covering his legs that I've only seen in the dojo locker room; the scent of a light cologne around him; and the entailing, lustful grin he gives me. Am I dreaming, or is he really giving me that look?_

_"Hi," I spit out, saving myself from the stammering mess that comes out of my mouth. "How's it going?"_

_"Well, I thought your lady friend called me here, but she left as quickly as possible, so..."_

_"Oh, uh, sh-she had to run and take care of something," I lie. God, I could just get this over with, and never embarrass myself like this again. I know he will say no, but why should I care? What if he says yes? "Listen Jack...would you like to go on a date with me next week?"_

_Okay, where the fuck did that come from? When did I suddenly get the balls to ask a guy out? How am I not running away from study hall, to catch my breath from saying that in one breath?_

_I sigh, and stare at my hands, ignoring whatever look he's giving me, and after hearing a chuckle, my blush gets deeper. "Yes, I'll go on a date with you."_

_"Oh, well, there goes my—black belt say what now?"_

_"I said yes," he laughs back. I still stare with wonderment._

I couldn't believe it myself. It was the first time I've ever felt so perplexed, and relieved at the same time. Jack said yes. That's when everything started - the dates, the sneaking around, the three little words he says before he kisses my neck, the sensitive spots that he knew all too well, the dark marks that would be his territory forever, the promises...

They're now broken.

I'll never forgive myself from falling for mister fan service. I'll never forgive myself for believing that Jack was the only one for me, that nothing else mattered in the world except for being with Jack. Nothing would make me more happier if I wished that he didn't exist, and my life would turn back to normal.

But what is normal, when you've had a wonderful boyfriend that chose you?

_The first date was awkward, and eventually interrupted by Kim. She showed up, and ruined everything. I can't believe I thought I would ever go on a date with Jack. It was too good to be true. Fuck. Fuck my life, and my screwups. Fuck everything._

_I can hear the words now - that whole date was awkward, and I hope we never have to do it again. Let's just be friends._

_Yeah, let's just stay in the friend zone because she ruined everything for the both of us. I'll just watch her get everything, and I'll just wallow in stupidity and confused boy hormones. I'll just be like dust - a burden that's no longer needed, and I'll be forgotten._

_"Hey," I turn around, and Jack's standing there, with his hands in his pockets. It's been three days since the date, and I avoid him at all costs. But now, I can't. We're in the dojo locker room, and practice is over. Everyone is going home, but I stick around and wallow. I should've packed up and leave, when I had the chance. "You okay?"_

_"Peachy keen," I reply sarcastically, slamming my locker shut. He doesn't deserve my anger...no one does. But I can't hold this any longer. "I was just leaving."_

_"Milton, wait," Jack grabs my wrist, and pulls me back. Immediately, before I'm completely aware of it, his lips are quickly on mine. I don't move from initial shock, but his lips moving against mine wakes me up. I sigh deeply, and kiss back, allowing my free hand to cup his face. I can't believe this is happening. I'm actually kissing the guy of my dreams, the guy whom I ever wanted since the first day we met. My dreams are coming true - and it starts with a steamy kiss in a locker room._

_I'm glad this is happening._

_I'm not entirely feeling the setting, but I'm happy, either way._

_We both pull away, and his eyes are twinkling, half-lidded with lust. He catches his breath, and lets go of my wrist to grab my bony waist._

_I want to say something, but I feel like that would kill the moment, so I don't. I just grin. He grins back. We're laughing. It's funny, yet affectionate. We've waited way too long for this._

_"I choose you."_

It was only a matter of time before Kim starts planning against us; the whole issue between me and one of my closest girl friends, becoming a stupid feud that separated us for the worse. I never knew how far she went, until today.

Sometimes, the tension was so bad, I couldn't bare to go to the dojo alone.

Kim was always there, ready to steal him away and have him grovel to her womanly needs. She'll tell him how I would never give him everything; like a child, the acceptance into the family, or the supplemental feminine need that a man wants.

Boy, was she wrong. If we betted on who was the girl, I _definitely_ wasn't. Well, completely.

_Fifteen weeks. Yes, I've been counting. It's been fifteen weeks since we started our relationship. It's been fifteen weeks since he kissed me in the locker rooms, sealing the deal between us that I thought was never going to happen. However, it's fifteen weeks, and no one knows._

_Things were getting pretty serious, and things are getting physical. Just yesterday, we were so close to taking that step, but I stopped myself before we go any further. I want to wait. I want our first time to be special._

_"I want your shirt," Jack mumbles into my ear, with a grin that I've only seen yesterday and other days when he gives me that look. It's only a shirt, and it's the shirt I was wearing when we first kissed. Ironic, isn't it?_

_"It's just a shirt," I shrug._

_"It's the shirt I kissed you in, and I think it's important that I have it, for a keepsake," Jack says back, wiping the sweat from his face from sparring. "You have my jock strap."_

_"That's because you_ left _it there, and insisted that I_ keep _it for a memento," I roll my eyes in annoyance. "If anything, I want the shirt you wore when I first asked you out on a date."_

_"Ew, that shirt is disgusting and covered in prepubescent boy sweat," he recoils immediately. Seriously, I think he's just as effeminate as me, and that says a lot. It's funny though, because I don't have to be the clean one all of the time. He has a reason to style his hair, or smell so good, or look so good, or feel so good under my fingertips, or kiss so fucking good..."At least the jock strap is clean."_

_"It is now," I mumble._

_"Ew, stop being so sickeningly sweet, it's making my eyes throw up rainbows!" Jerry groans, and walks away from the two of us. I laugh out loud - that's one less person to tell._

_"What? How did you–"_

_"Remember when I walked in on you two weeks ago at your house? I heard you moaning Milton's name, which doesn't surprise me."_

_I laugh even harder when I see the darkened cheeks of my boyfriend, upon Jerry saying that. "Aha, so you lied to me! You do think about me when you mast—"_

_"Ew ew ew! Just...stop! The both of you,_ stop _!"_

_"What are you guys talking about?" A feminine voice makes us stop laughing and joking around, and the dojo is still with quietness. Kim stares at the three of us with a wary look. She didn't take it well when Jack dumped her, and she demands to know the "lucky bitch" to steal her man. Like he was ever hers._

_"Their sickeningly sweet relationship," Jerry points to the both of us, but we don't glare at him. We just join our hands together, and give a satisfied smile. "They're like girls with penises when they're together, talking about clean hair and clothes and shit. I've known for weeks."_

_Kim's cheeks redden with embarrassment and anger, and I almost fear for my life when she steps closer. "You told me that—"_

_"I told you that you were not the girl for me, and that I love someone else," he argues before she finishes her sentence. He tightens his grip on my hand, and I sheepishly smile to myself, feeling a flutter in my heart. I must be that somebody he loves._

_Kim sneers, "So, you chose a boy?"_

_"No, I chose_ someone _I love."_

I can just say Kim was mad. The next day, she seemed okay with it, but her eyes gave the lie away.

She was never okay with it. She wanted him. She wanted to destroy a relationship, because she really loved him. I love him too, but it's over.

It's all over, and I have her to thank. Thank you Kim, for destroying my relationship, and stealing Jack away from me. But, you will never take away the good times we've had. I would never forget them, because it's those good times that makes me feel whole anymore. It's those good times that makes me remember that he was a good friend, an amazing boyfriend, and a particularly eternal partner that I would never let go of.

But I let him go.

_I glare at Kim, while she tries to put her man hands on Jack's arms, yet again. They were in that new movie (that turned out horrible) and apparently, they just can't stop touching each other. Each touch makes me clench my fists, because she knows he's taken, and his boyfriend is watching every damn move. Kim lightly taps him, gives him unnecessary high fives, throws her arms around his shoulders - what the fuck is this?_

_"Green isn't your color, ginger tiger," Julie mutters at me, while I try not to go over there and flip her on her back._

_"How would you feel if some chick was putting her gorilla hands on your man, no matter if she was your friend?"_

_"I'd beat the living_ shit _out of her," she replies, with the same fiery tone._

By then, we were almost a year. It's been going on for way too long, and Jack lets her do this. I don't think he notices, but I do. I definitely do.

_"She's always touching you, Jack!"_

_"Oh come on Milton, she knows that I'm with you."_

_"She may know that, but that didn't stop her from saying how you will be hers by the end of the year!"_

_"When did she say that?"_

_"The beginning of the year! I told you, she's fucking mental if she thinks she will ever get between us."_

_Jack smiles. "That's the spirit. I won't let_ any _girl get in between us."_

_"Yeah, because every girl except for Kim understands the importance of boundaries," I utter. I feel Jack hands wrap around my waist, bringing us closer while he leans against the school lockers. It's empty, but everyone already knows about us. I smile back, and allow myself to melt into his embrace. I hope he means that._

_"Remember, I chose you, so_ no _one would ever threaten us."_

He chose me, out of everyone.

He always kept telling me, despite my insecurities, that he chose me.

_"How did you learn to hit those high notes?!" It's after the battle of the bands, Our band wins, making us a thousand dollars richer, to fund for the band at school, and the small party disbands as quickly as it got here. I have my friends to thank, but if anyone gets the higher gratitude, it would be my boyfriend Jack, most of the way. Yeah, at first we sucked, but he realized something._

_One, we can do our own thing and still sound like a goddamn rock band. Fuck yes, we're_ that _good._

 _Two, he is a_ horrible _singer. Seriously, he may look good, but that voice sounds like angry cats scratching on a chalkboard. Repeatedly._

_Three, he needs to put eyeliner more often._

_Okay, maybe not the last one, but every time I saw Jack with the eyeliner, I couldn't help myself. After my friends left the school after the gig at Phil's, it was now or never, and I took that advantage. Let's just say, it's the first time I_ ever _took charge._

_"I was kneed in the crotch."_

_It still hurts, but maybe he can kiss it to make it feel better. "Aw baby, I'll fix that up later."_

_"Ew, guys, we're right here!" The band members agree, with playful snarls on their faces. Knowing perfectly when their cue is, they start to leave the both of us, alone._

_I laugh, and allow him to pepper my neck with sweet kisses. "We're finally alone."_

_"And you're still wearing your eyeliner."_

That was a week before today. Everything seemed to play out after that, and I thought things would be better, but then...

_My lips turn into a scowl, trying to hold back the tears of betrayal and heartbreak. There he is, kissing her. It's not just a normal kiss - oh, no - it's a passionate, no-holds-barred, borderline French kiss, and I'm just standing there, right behind him, watching the two obvious lovebirds from the start, enjoy each other's lips._

_She got her wish: she stole him away from me._

_Jack pushes her away and turns around, and he finally sees me. After seeing his slightly flushed face, it was clear to me. I was nothing, and he used me to make her insanely jealous._

_I turn around and start walking, letting the tears run freely._

_I feel Jack's hand grab my wrist, but I easily twist my wrist out of his grip, and glare at him. "Fuck you."_

_"I—"_

_"Don't even try to explain yourself over that despicable display, Brewer!" I roar, keeping my hands in place to refrain myself from slapping him in the face. "You were enjoying it! Don't lie to me, you enjoyed it!"_

_"No, I didn't!" he argues._

_"Oh, what a load of bull!" I shout. "You know what, Jack? You can have each other. You can have a plethora of people you can choose from if you don't work out. I'm no longer going to stop you. We're over."_

_Before he can reply, I turn around again, and start running._

I sob again into the pillow that smells just like him, inside the room where we did everything together, as one. I want to burn this room, with me in it, and never look back. I never want to see his stupid face again, especially since he has her. She got her wish, and she conquered it.

It's been hours since the breakup. My phone's been ringing off the hook. My parents are happy to find out that I'm not with Jack anymore. I only picked up the phone once, to speak to Julie before allowing myself to cry again. Everything hurts. I can't believe I let myself believe those lies for three years, and have it thrown away by some blond, possessive chick who wanted him since day one.

I can't believe Jack threw three years of a relationship away.

"Hey!" I pick my head up, and I see Jack standing there in front of me, with the window open. He's a mess - his eyes are bloodshot; his hair is messed up; his left hand is bloody; and the seventeen year old glory I fell for crumbles right in front of my bed. Unabashedly, I run over to my emergency first aid kit under my bed, and treat his wounds. I'm still a germaphobe, no matter if I hate the person or not.

"I'm sorry Milton," he sniffles, with a shedded tear falling to his shirt. "It was all a misunderstanding, I swear. Kim came on to me."

"Just shut up," I growl, and crumple up the bandage wrappers in my hand. "I don't want to fucking hear it. I'm only doing this because I don't want blood on my bed sheets."

"But—"

"Shut the _fuck_ up!" I yell. "I don't want you to say a word, Jack. We're over, and you can enjoy the many girls who's been dreaming about jumping on your free dick for free rides. I could care less."

"You're right," he whispers, but I turn around and pay no attention to whatever he has to say. He obviously chose the girl, like always. He gets his fairytale life, and she gets her fairytale ending. What do I get, not a goddamn thing. "There's a plethora of people I can choose from. But, I chose you."

Here we go _again_.

"I choose you because I love _you_. You're everything to me. You bring out the best in me, no matter how stupid I act, or how badly I treat you sometimes...I chose you three years ago, because not only you were my best friend, you were my crush, and I knew that what I had for you was stronger than lust, or an infatuation. I love you."

I turn around, and he's still standing there, the bed separating the both of us. "Why, Jack? Why do you love me? Why am i the only person for you?"

"Because, I wouldn't have come back to you. I wouldn't have punched a wall, or cry relentlessly, or call you for the past two hours if you didn't matter to me. I also wouldn't endure your best friend kicking my ass, but that's not the point." I couldn't help but chuckle at that. I would love to see someone kick his ass for once, no matter how much I love him. "The point is, is that I love _you_ , and I want to be with _you_ , not some jealous girl that only cares about her image."

Jack walks around my bed and gets closer to me, and pulls me in his embrace. I sigh, because I know I can't escape it. This is the guy I've wanted for years, and I'm letting him go because Kim, the stupid bitch, smooched him in front of me, and I overreact. I don't know, I always had a reason to freak out because she liked him so much, but he could leave me at any point to be with any other girl that tickles his fancy. For the three years we've been together, he's never did such a thing.

"I love you too," I whisper back, and start sobbing again against his chest. " I love you so fucking much, that it hurts."

"It doesn't have to hurt anymore, because I'm here," he says. "And I'm not going _anywhere_."

I lift my head up, and stare at Jack. His eyes twinkle with tears and forgiveness and hope, and I can't tear away from that. "You chose me."

"I chose you."


End file.
